END OF WORLD: MAY 21, 2011

RALEIGH, N.C. – According to a Christian group, Judgment Day is May 21, 2011.  Soon after that… we’ll all be dead.

If there had been time, Marie Exley would have liked to start a family. Instead, the 32-year-old Army veteran has less than six months left, which she’ll spend spreading a stark warning: Judgment Day is almost here.

Exley is part of a movement of Christians loosely organized by radio broadcasts and websites, independent of churches and convinced by their reading of the Bible that the end of the world will begin May 21, 2011.

To get the word out, they’re using billboards and bus stop benches, traveling caravans of RVs and volunteers passing out pamphlets on street corners . Cities from Bridgeport, Conn., to Little Rock, Ark., now have billboards with the ominous message, and mission groups are traveling through Latin America and Africa to spread the news outside the U.S.

“A lot of people might think, ‘The end’s coming, let’s go party,’” said Exley, a veteran of two deployments in Iraq. “But we’re commanded by God to warn people. I wish I could just be like everybody else, but it’s so much better to know that when the end comes, you’ll be safe.”

In August, Exley left her home in Colorado Springs, Colo., to work with Oakland, Calif.-based Family Radio Worldwide, the independent Christian ministry whose leader, Harold Camping, has calculated the May 21 date based on his reading of the Bible.

She is organizing traveling columns of RVs carrying the message from city to city, a logistics challenge that her military experience has helped solve. The vehicles are scheduled to be in five North Carolina cities between now and the second week of January, but Exley will shortly be gone: overseas, where she hopes to eventually make it back to Iraq.

“I don’t really have plans to come back,” she said. “Time is short.”

Not everyone who’s heard Camping’s message is taking such a dramatic step. They’re remaining in their day-to-day lives, but helping publicize the prophecy in other ways. Allison Warden, of Raleigh, has been helping organize a campaign using billboards, post cards and other media in cities across the U.S. through a website, We Can Know.

The 29-year-old payroll clerk laughs when asked about reactions to the message, which is plastered all over her car.

“It’s definitely against the grain, I know that,” she said. “We’re hoping people won’t take our word for it, or Harold Camping’s word for it. We’re hoping that people will search the scriptures for themselves.”

Camping, 89, believes the Bible essentially functions as a cosmic calendar explaining exactly when various prophecies will be fulfilled.

The retired civil engineer said all his calculations come from close readings of the Bible, but that external events like the foundation of the state of Israel in 1948 are signs confirming the date.

“Beyond the shadow of a doubt, May 21 will be the date of the Rapture and the day of judgment,” he said.

The doctrine known as the Rapture teaches that believers will be taken up to heaven, while everyone else will remain on earth for a period of torment, concluding with the end of time. Camping believes that will happen in October.

“If May 21 passes and I’m still here, that means I wasn’t saved. Does that mean God’s word is inaccurate or untrue? Not at all,”  Warden said.

The belief that Christ will return to earth and bring an end to history has been a basic element of Christian belief since the first century. The Book of Revelation, which comes last in the New Testatment, describes this conclusion in vivid language that has inspired Christians for centuries.

But few churches are willing to set a date for the end of the world, heeding Jesus’ words in the gospels of Mark and Matthew that no one can know the day or hour it will happen. Predictions like Camping’s, though, aren’t new. One of the most famous in history was by the Baptist leader William Miller, who predicted the end for Oct. 22, 1844, which came to be known as the Great Disappointment among his followers, some of whom subsequently founded the Seventh Day Adventist church.

“In the U.S., there is still a significant population, mostly Protestant, who look at the Bible as kind of a puzzle, and the puzzle is God’s word and it’s predicting when the end times will come,” said Catherine Wessinger, a professor at Loyola University in New Orleans who studies millennialism, the belief in pending apocalypse.

“A lot of times these prophecies gain traction when difficulties are happening in society,” she said. “Right now, there’s a lot of insecurity, and this is a promise that says it’s not all random, it’s part of God’s plan.”

Past predictions that failed to come true don’t have any bearing on the current calculation, believers maintain.

“It would be like telling the Wright brothers that every other attempt to fly has failed, so you shouldn’t even try,” said Chris McCann, who works with eBible Fellowship, one of the groups spreading the message.

For believers like McCann, theirs is actually a message of hope and compassion: God’s compassion for people, and the hope that there’s still time to be saved.

That, ultimately, is what spurs on Exley, who said her beliefs have alienated her from most of her friends and family. Her hope is that not everyone who hears her message will mock it, and that even people who dismiss her now might still come to believe.

“If you still want to say we’re crazy, go ahead,” she said. “But it doesn’t hurt to look into it.”

OBAMAS GO TO CARNEVALE

RIO DE JANEIRO – President Obama and First Lady Michelle Obama headed to Rio to celebrate Carnevale!

There is a crisis in the Mideast, a crisis in Wisconsin, a looming budget crisis so… what better time for the President to go the biggest party in the world!

President Obama and the First Lady headed down to Rio – with Giselle Bundchen and Tom Brady – to take in the festivities.   They all joined the Beija Flor Samba School and marched (danced) in the Sambadrome.  Michelle is pictured above.

Here is the President’s costume:

Here’s Giselle:

Here’s Tom Brady:

Many government officials in Washington were outraged that the President would go on a vacation during the Libyan crisis.  White House Press Secretary, Jay Carney, told reporters, “Look the President wants to be clear… he loves a good party and there’s no way he’s going to miss it.  Why should he let a crazy man like Ghadaffi ruin the party.”

Carney went on to say that the President is going to make an “important” decision about Libya in the next month – after he reviews all the options.  “All the options are on the table, and the President needs to spread out the options and sit at the table and look them over.  But he won’t be at the table until he gets back from Rio.”

The Rio Carnival is a wild 4 day celebration, 40 days before Easter. It officially starts on Saturday and finishes on Fat Tuesday with the beginning of Lent on Ash Wednesday after which one is supposed to abstain from all bodily pleasures. Carnival with all its excesses, celebrated as a profane event, can be considered an act of farewell to the pleasures of the flesh. It usually happens in February, the hottest month in the Southern Hemisphere, when the Rio summer is at its peak.

D’ALESSANDRO: BEST SOCCER PLAYER IN THE WORLD

BRAZIL -  The Argentinean soccer star, Andres D’Alessandro, has been named the greatest soccer player in the world by FIFA.

Andres D’Alessandro won the Copa Libertadores da America with his team Internacional.  Soon after FIFA officals voted D’Alessandro The Greatest Soccer Player in the World.

D’Alessandro is a left-footed footballer who currently plays for Sport Club Internacional in Brazil. He is best known for his dribbling and his short passing ability.  Many consider him the best left-footed player to ever step on the pitch.  Pele has said that D’Alessandro may prove to be the greatest soccer player to ever live.

D’Alessandro beat out fellow Argentinean star, Lionel Messi,  Portugal star Cristiano Ronaldo, Swedish stars Zlatan Ibrahimovic and Adam Hofverberg,  Steven Gerrard,  Samuel Eto’o,  Kaka, Xavi, Fernando Torrres, Frank Lampard and of course David Beckham (who begged to be put on the top ten list) for the FIFA honor.

D’Alessandro, is the most popular Argentinean midfield player in the history of the sport.  He recently edged fellow Argentinean Veron and the Brazilian striker Neymar to become the Best Soccer Player in America, 2010, awarded each year by the Uruguayan newspaper El Pais.

D’Alessandro received the news while visiting his cousin, Troy D’Alessandro, a rising American soccer star, in Jacksonville, Florida.  He also met with his cousin, Greg D’Alessandro, a Hollywood screenwriter and director who is shooting a documentary about the Argentinean star.

What do you think, did FIFA  make the right choice?

GAGA LOSES “MOST LIKED” TITLE

Lady Gaga loses number one spot to Eminem on Facebook
Even though Eminem did not walk away with the Grammy’s Album of the Year award, again, that did not stop him from bulldozing his way to the top of the social network.
Until now, Lady Gaga was the reigning queen of Facebook as the most “liked” artist on the popular social networking site. But now queen Gaga has been dethroned and the internet has now crowned a new queen king, Eminem.
Eminem surpassed Lady Gaga’s “like” total of 28,872,000 by implementing a guerilla style internet campaign to “get his like on” garnering him a staggering 35,659,000 total “likes” in no time. Em achieved this immense margin by gaining in excess of a million “likes” a week and the trend does not seem to be stopping.
When Gaga heard the news she was enraged beyond belief.
“I cannot believe the tactics that he used to achieve this status,” exclaimed Gaga, “What he did here was unconscionable and I, for one, will not stand for it!”
Having her internet hands tied over the matter, she decided to take the matter into her literal hands. Lady Gaga has publicaly challenged Eminem to a fight. That’s right an old school 3 o’clock, parking lot style throw down.

The fight is scheduled to take place later next month in the parking lot of an abandoned GM factory in Detroit. Gaga said that she would allow the fight to be on Em’s home turf since she called him out.
“I’m gonna f**k that bitch up! She don’t know what she done got herself into!” retaliated Eminem.

Several other stars plan to attend the brawl and they are taking sides.
Team Eminem currently has a roster of Dr. Dre, Llyod Banks, Lil Wayne, and, surprisingly, Sir Elton John.
Team Gaga, to date, consists of with Beyonce, Nicki Minaj, Yoko Ono, and Yanni.
“There was a lot of talk in Hollywood as to which side Elton would take. His decision was a bit of a shock to us all especially after the announcement that Lady Gaga would be the godmother of his adopted son,” said Extra’s Mario Lopez, “But my money is on Gaga, Yoko is one mean bitch and Yanni fights dirty.”
Who do you have your money on?

BJ PENN TO BECOME A POET

SYDNEY, AUSTRALIA – After the UFC 127 majority draw BJ Penn calls it quits to get creative.

BJ Penn, born Jay Dee Penn, considered leaving the octagon once before after a losing a second time to Frankie Edgar. But the love of the sport reeled him back in for another 9 matches. However, it seems as though that the recent tie to Jon Fitch in UFC 127 was more than Penn could handle and is calling it quits for good.

Shortly after the results from the recent UFC 127 event, Penn announced that he would be retiring to work on his life dream of being a published poet.

“I don’t want to do this anymore; I don’t know what’s wrong. If I’m going to go out there and perform like that, maybe this isn’t something worth doing,” said Penn.

Since a young boy Penn had always been interested in poetry. He explained that he found a striking similarity between the sense of calm that he felt after training in martial arts to the clarity and enlightenment that he gains after penning his poetic prose.

Penn continued by stating, “As soon as the fight was done, a million different things were running through my head. I’m kind of disappointed I gave away the third round like that. I know now that sitting down at my writing desk with a warm cup of chamomile tea will really help me to work through this.”

However, Penn should really find no shame in fighting the world’s No. 2 welterweight to a draw. But as we now know the 32-year-old has had other interests outside of his professional fighting career, like getting his first book of poetry on the shelves of bookstores throughout the world.

Although still looking for a publisher, Penn hopes to have his work available by late 2011.

SKUNK APE

FORT LAUDERDALE, FL – After years of hiding out in Everglades National Park, Skunk Ape is having a coming out party.

For the past twenty years stories have been told in South Florida about the hideous and vile smelling skunk ape who preys upon deer, fox, alligators, and sometimes even humans.

Skunk Ape has returned!

He has been described as a mix of  an ape and a skunk, Bigfoot and a dirty diaper, and Danny Devito without the farting noises. Though, without photos verifying proof or anyone sober verifying proof, for that matter, it has not been brought to the public’s attention, until today.

Skunk Ape is looking to get out of the swamp and into girl’s bikinis. He has been sighted up and down Fort Lauderdale Beach and some have claimed to even see him as far south as Miami. He has been drinking, dancing, and “getting dirty” some have claimed as they have seen him carousing the sand looking for dance partners and drinking buddies.

Kim Cloisters, from Delray Beach, came in town last weekend and noticed a huge pile of hair swaying back and forth to techno music. “At first I was a little afraid when he approached, but once you get past the smell, he is pretty similar to any other guy from Jersey that hasn’t been waxed in a while.”

In fact, the Skunk Ape seems to be the life of the party down in South Florida these days. Aside from two reports of dogs missing on the beaches, there have been no complaints about this seemingly lovable oaf. He has even gotten a few affectionate nicknames, the main two being Harry and Odie, short for odorous I expect.

Looks like Skunk Ape, from the pictures and stories swirling around Fort Lauderdale, seems to have found himself a new home.

UFO OVER JERUSALEM!

JERUSALEM – UFOs have been spotted over the Dome of the Rock – an ancient Islamic shrine!
Ever since violence has erupted in Egypt there have been numerous sightings of UFOs over Jerusalem, particularly over the Dome of the Rock – and ancient Islamic shrine.
Israeli, British and American intelligence agencies have confirmed over two thousand UFO sightings over Jerusalem in the last ten days.
“These UFOs are real.  The videos that were shot of the UFOs are the most incredible videos ever shot,”  said UK Ministry of Defense UFO investigator Nick Pope.  U.S. Secretary of Defense, Robert Gates, said  “this confirms what the U.N. and our intelligence agencies have been tracking for the last several months – there is an ongoing alien invasion occurring around the globe.”

Some skeptics believe the UFOs are really aircraft belonging to the Israeli army, some believe that they are high-tech drones.  “Nonsense,” said Israeli General, Avi Meade.  “The spaceships that we have observed, and videotaped, hovering over the Dome of the Rock are the much more advanced pieces of technology than anything created by man on Earth.”

The U.N. Panel on Extraterrestrials issued a statement late today.  “This is final proof that aliens exist and are attacking Earth.  We must come together and fight them.”

But why are the aliens flying over the Dome of the Rock — an ancient Islamic shrine?  Flying above the shrine is strictly  — forbidden.

Professor John Malley of the U.N. Panel on Extraterrestrials said,  “the aliens are clearly upset with the recent developments in Egypt. They are sending a message:  resolve this conflict or we will resolve it for you.”

WWN has reported extensively about the ongoing alien invasion that has been documented to begin in early 2011 and continue until 2015 – when the whole world will be under alien control.   Governments around the world are trying to cover-up the invasion in any way they can.   But, the U.N. Panel is trying to counter act this propaganda campaign.
“The alien invasion is under way.  Jerusalem is just the beginning,” said Professor Malley.
Here are two clips of the UFOs over Jerusalem: